Posts about: That Awkward Moment When
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
It used to be if we drove 30 mins from home we would end up in Prescott or Ash Fork if we went the other direction, but now that we live in Germany, we end up in yet another picturesque village with castles and churches and all of the colors I love.
This time it was a little town called Burglengenfeld. When we have driven through it before (always at night) it has reminded me of a resort town, or a destination place because it has a little bit of everything! There's a river, and an old town, and lots of boutiques and cute shops.
We accidently found this amazing park!
We attempted the castle but I read somewhere on the interweb it's owned by a business and it is now an older folks home. We went into the gate anyway, and there was obviously something either about to happen, or it had already happened. There were wooden figures, and explanations of everything all in German. We definitely felt awkward so we quickly left but not before snapping a few pictures.
We headed downtown for apparently the best gelato ever! And it was good! I had mango. This is not my first eis of the season, it's my 2nd. But I liked it much better than my first.
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Then we met up with these folks. And went to another park and went to eat and had fun! I love having friends in Germany!
This time it was a little town called Burglengenfeld. When we have driven through it before (always at night) it has reminded me of a resort town, or a destination place because it has a little bit of everything! There's a river, and an old town, and lots of boutiques and cute shops.
We accidently found this amazing park!
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| You can see the castle up on the hill |
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| An amazing zip line. I have a video I need to show. So fun! |
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| The skyyyyyyyy |
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| A view from the bench. :-) |
We attempted the castle but I read somewhere on the interweb it's owned by a business and it is now an older folks home. We went into the gate anyway, and there was obviously something either about to happen, or it had already happened. There were wooden figures, and explanations of everything all in German. We definitely felt awkward so we quickly left but not before snapping a few pictures.
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| You can kind of see one of the wood figures I was talking about next to that booth. |
We headed downtown for apparently the best gelato ever! And it was good! I had mango. This is not my first eis of the season, it's my 2nd. But I liked it much better than my first.
Then we met up with these folks. And went to another park and went to eat and had fun! I love having friends in Germany!
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| Gasthof au am Kronen (The Restaurant we ate at) |
The menu translation from German to English was terrible. It says, "All year round wild specialties from home woods freshly on the day ticket."
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| The Rathaus or City Hall |
Soon after this picture, Ian fell right over. Then David did. It was hilarious. Then they had a contest to see who could stay on the longest. hahaha.
I'm trying to be better about documenting our days. Chelsi appropriately called me a picture something. I can't remember what word she used. But what she was saying was, I take tons of pictures but do not often do anything with them. So they just sit. Unused and sad. So I am trying to be better! It's hard! I don't love it really. There's this fine line between being annoying and way too vague. And I like balance! ha. Anyway, we will see how long this lasts! Are any of you gonna come visit soon so we can take you here?
Friday, January 2, 2015
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| forts, music, messes and army boots |
A lady almost knocked over a display today in the store because she was staring at me in my scooter. I didn't see it but I heard it. Ha.
The other day I ran into a display. I wasn't aware at how fast my scooter actually went in reverse. What's even more embarrassing is my neighbor saw it. Thankfully she laughed with me. And also at me.
There are all sorts of things I am being forced to learn. I think the one I really am focusing on right now is how not to care what people think.
Every time I go into the store and I get the big red scooter, I have to drive by the registers on the way back. All of them. And Big Red has a speed setting on it which would be great if it weren't broken. Im pretty sure its on the slowest setting of all. So I'm that lady. The slow, meandering old lady in a wheelchair. It'd be wayyy cooler if I was a teeny bit speedy. Then I would be bad ace. Anyway, I realized after my sweat had subsided that I don't care. I mean, I totally do. But I'm practicing not caring. I've never been in a position of being the person everyone stares at. I've never broken a bone before now, never shaved my head, never had reconstructive surgery requiring bandages on my face, etc. All of which i am grateful for. But now I am THAT person. The crazy red haired lady with a giant boot and crutches and/or a scooter. Wait, maybe I HAVE always been the person people stare at. Hmm... Anyway, too deep for now.
I had to check Chelsi in at the gate and therefore people had a lot of opportunities to gawk. I walked up that ramp with pride and even held onto the railing like I owned it. No I didn't. But it's my story and I'll retell it like I want.
The thing is, people are curious I guess. And I am always sweaty because of it. I never wear a coat because I'm always so dang hot. But guess what? Today I bought another poncho! They're totally on sale at the PX. Go get one! Except you probably can't. I'll send you one if you want.
I am tired of not wearing regular pants. I totally COULD wear regular pants but then I have to wear them UNDER my boot because wide legged pants went out when I was in like 9th grade. When will those come back in style? I wish it were now because those would sure come in handy. Anyway, so most of my regular pants lean on the side of skinny jeans and so they don't fit on the outside of The Boot. Therefore stretchy pants it is. And I'm a little tired of black.
My leg is totally swoll right now. Like, do you even lift bro, kind of swoll. Except I don't lift. So it's the swoll as in, swollen. I wanna take a picture to show you but it looks like a cankle and that's not cute. And that's not how I want you to remember me.
This was gonna be a life lessons post but I'm forgetting that. Because I want to write about other things. Like how awesome my people are. David's been cooking freaking awesome food. We are going to make a cookbook. Well, he is doing the recipes and I will make it. The book. Not the food. Psshhhh. But what I'm struggling with is whether I should post the recipes on my blog or just wait? What should I do? We aren't doing a diet, but just eating whole foods. Or trying to anyway. David has lost 5 pounds in 5 days. Whatever. I hate men. lol. Joke.
My man is pretty great. We need a date. It rhymes. We haven't been out for awhile now and I miss him when I don't get to spend time with him one on one. He's currently upstairs brushing teeth and reading books to the kids. Which he does every night. He isn't in a rush, he just takes his time. That's pretty great. And I guarantee you, my kids will remember these times more than anything.
What a weird random post right? It's these weird random things though, that I want to remember. The little details. I think I always say that. Anyway, I did a bunch of DIY stuff tonight that I can't wait to show you. And it's not a bunch. It's like one thing. Which I stole from Pinterest. Does that still count?
What are you doing right. this. second. Besides reading this post of course? Cause we all know you are all multi-taskers. Are you eating? Watching a show? Taking a bath? Tell me!
Saturday, November 22, 2014
Plans were in place. I had a date on the way. Who also has a husband. But that's besides the point. Anyway, I put on a smoky eye, lip stain, a cute jacket and my sparkly boot socks.
And then it clicked. Well snapped. Literally. It hit me, as I glided (I say glided cause it's much nicer than fell) down the stairs. I wouldnt be seeing The Hunger Games tonight because I would be spending it in the hospital instead.
As I layed in the doorway to Jacksons room, I was holloring in pain much as im sure Katniss does in the movie, although I won't know at least for awhile. I thought for sure I could make it a few years without these stairs getting the best of me. All of my Germany friends know what I'm talking about when I say its you against them. 3 sets of them. They won this time.
I convinced David and Chelsi to please call 911 except thats not the number in Germany. And I probably didn't say please. We had to Google it. None of us will forget from now on. It's 112 here.
I cried and begged and acted like a fool asking them to please help me. They assured me they were doing everything they could which they really were. I didnt want to be moved but I wanted to be moved. I wanted it to stop but I didnt want them to touch me. Nevie was so sweet. She started crying and asked me several times if I was okay. It wasn't until i told her I was that she was convinced, and her little eyes stopped frowning.
The paramedics arrived and they so felt so bad for not being able to find a vein for an IV so they called the doctor to come do it. What? Awesome! Thank you for caring Germany.
He found it less than one minute after arriving and immediately I felt better. Mostly cause they pumped something amazing into my arm. A few minutes later, I was still feeling a little pain so the doctor gave me more cause he said i was such a good patient. Haha.
That's when they relocated my dislocated ankle. David said something was protruding and they put it back in place. He didnt even get a picture of the before. Haha.
On the way to the hospital they made me count 10 deep breaths because i really wanted to take a nap! After vomiting at the hospital, he said he probably over did it on the medication. Lol. I kept asking them if they were all grossed out and David is pretty sure they had no idea what that phrase meant. They were so nice! Although, even when high, I didn't want to take my clothes off in front of 3 men and 4 women so half of them left. Is that normal? David was such a good sport trying to walk them through my crazy questions about Germans and nudity and other such topics.
Christina in the ER was so kind. She was funny and like a mom. She took care of me and laughed at my stupid jokes and answered all my dumb questions. Remind me to thank her. Dr. Harsch (true name) was also very nice.
I got an x-ray by Christian. And it has been determined at this time I have a fractured fibula and ankle. The doc wants a CT scan so that's happening tomorrow. He said this kind of fracture (in my leg) is rare. In the meantime I'm casted and enjoying my view from the 5th floor of the Weiden Hospital.
Although I'm sharing a room (she's nice and is helping me translate things from my nurse who hardly speaks English), the room is awesome and my bed is comfortable (it has this amazing duvet covered comforter).
Im fighting in my own hunger games though as im not allowed to eat before my CT scan. Who will win? What will happen next? Stay tuned for the next installment of Lisas Hunger Games!
Sunday, May 25, 2014
So I'm sure there is some new age quote about how "things" don't equal happiness, but in my case, they do. We've been living without our "stuff" for a long time now. Essentially since November. We have it now! Life is complete!
It was delivered just 2 days ago and it's like Christmas. But better. It's like a birthday and anniversary and Valentines Day. Presents everywhere!
They wrapped everything! I mean, everything. Like the plastic cup we use in the bath for the kids. And individual shoes. And also, little army men.
I'm so glad we brought our old disgusting pans across the country.
We came from a really small house so there were a lot of things in storage we didn't get to use in the trailer. So reopening it up was so fun! Wedding pictures, frames I didn't know I had!
It's also pretty great because there are pieces of people I love all over now. Keep in mind, I'm still very much in the process of moving in. But that China hutch Megan passed along to me? I have that! Guess what's inside of it? China that Belle gave me. There's plates from Trish I never gave back. And a typewriter from Grandma and Grandpa Menlove.
David unpacked my dad. Hahaha. It's not funny. But he said it was pretty awkward. He was just unpacking boxes and the item he pulled out seemed heavy. There's a reason why! I meant to give him to Steph and Chelsi. But in the midst of everything, I forgot. I'm kind of glad he's getting to be here in Germany with me. He would have loved it here. Wait! He is loving it here!
I can't wait for everyone to come visit. I'm hoping by the time people want to come here, I'll at least have cleared a space for you/them to sleep. Right now there is a lot of boxes and children and crumbs and food and plastic totes hanging around.
The best thing we brought with us so far is our record player. We have loved having it because for me, having it is like having our parents here. Davids parents love Bread and Neil Diamond and I have the Eagles and Billy Joel to remind me of mine. It's really great. Then we have some Jack Johnson and Michael Jackson to keep it real. Haha.
Anyway, I know in real life "things" don't really mean that much. But right now, they bring me comfort which is something I've been missing a tiny bit. But not now. :-)
It was delivered just 2 days ago and it's like Christmas. But better. It's like a birthday and anniversary and Valentines Day. Presents everywhere!
They wrapped everything! I mean, everything. Like the plastic cup we use in the bath for the kids. And individual shoes. And also, little army men.
I'm so glad we brought our old disgusting pans across the country.
We came from a really small house so there were a lot of things in storage we didn't get to use in the trailer. So reopening it up was so fun! Wedding pictures, frames I didn't know I had!
It's also pretty great because there are pieces of people I love all over now. Keep in mind, I'm still very much in the process of moving in. But that China hutch Megan passed along to me? I have that! Guess what's inside of it? China that Belle gave me. There's plates from Trish I never gave back. And a typewriter from Grandma and Grandpa Menlove.
David unpacked my dad. Hahaha. It's not funny. But he said it was pretty awkward. He was just unpacking boxes and the item he pulled out seemed heavy. There's a reason why! I meant to give him to Steph and Chelsi. But in the midst of everything, I forgot. I'm kind of glad he's getting to be here in Germany with me. He would have loved it here. Wait! He is loving it here!
I can't wait for everyone to come visit. I'm hoping by the time people want to come here, I'll at least have cleared a space for you/them to sleep. Right now there is a lot of boxes and children and crumbs and food and plastic totes hanging around.
The best thing we brought with us so far is our record player. We have loved having it because for me, having it is like having our parents here. Davids parents love Bread and Neil Diamond and I have the Eagles and Billy Joel to remind me of mine. It's really great. Then we have some Jack Johnson and Michael Jackson to keep it real. Haha.
Anyway, I know in real life "things" don't really mean that much. But right now, they bring me comfort which is something I've been missing a tiny bit. But not now. :-)
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| Before we got our furniture! |
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Not only did this happen, it happened as I was pulling up to the gate at Fort Huachuca. Not only did it happen as I was pulling up to the gate at Fort Huachuca, it happened as I was blasting Missed Calls by Mac Miller. Edited of course. Boo. I had to turn it down at the very best part.
Guess what else? I got picked for a random car inspection!!! Yay! Wait, what? No. They totally segregated me and had me pull into the lane that was next to the long line of other cars so easily going through the gate after their ID check. Smooth sailing for them. I hope they enjoyed gawking at my beautiful red hair because I was totally trying to hide my face.
If we think about the details of what happened in the picture above, and if they were counting cars, then technically that rood person in front of me would have been picked for the selection instead of me. And the funny thing is I was totally going to be the person that sped up and didn't let them in. Because 2 stoplights back from where the line is for the gate, you can see which lanes are open. So I'm a freak and get in the right lane WAY back so as not to avoid the awkwardness that happens when people don't. pay. attention and they're stuck begging for mercy at the very last freakin second.
So I was just stopped. By myself. They checked my license, my military ID, my insurance, my registration and checked for drugs and other paraphernalia. They also patted me down. Just kidding. About the pat down anyway.
I'm exhausted from all of that hard work. I made it up to myself and listened to this song on the Eminem CD I own. This song actually made me cry. I couldn't find a good version to share. So I guess you'll be left wondering. Sorry about your life. If I can find it, I'll share it on the Facebook of life. In the meantime, don't be a lame driver please? Me and your fellow drivers will appreciate it so much!
Thursday, January 30, 2014
I was driving north on highway 89 where the construction is. I was reaching for French fries when I looked in my rear view mirror and noticed some crappy person tailing me like crazy. And then the lights went on. Not the ones in my head, but the blue and red ones.
So I pulled off the side of the road and had a brief panic attack in just enough time for the nice man in the tan uniform to come to my window. It was already rolled down and I already had my registration and proof of insurance in my hand.
The lights from his car reflected nicely off of his molestashe and the shadow from his Stetson made it even creepier.
"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"No I don't."
"Do you know what the speed limit is through that construction zone?"
"No I don't" These were all truths to me. Because lesbi honest here. My heart was racing and I was trying to figure out if maybe I flipped him off, or if I was swerving from French fry reaching or what.
"It's 35. You were going 57 when you passed me. Did you see me parked on the side of the road?"
"No I didn't." Again, you probably think I'm lying. But deep down to the core of my heart I. had. no. idea I was going so fast! I was going with the flow of traffic. I promise.
"I'm gonna need your license."
"I actually don't have it. But I know my number and I ordered my license online yesterday."
"What happened to it?"
"I have a 2 year old."
"Do you have the email?" At this point I was already desperately trying to search through my inbox to find it. I couldn't think straight and I"m pretty sure I searched for things non related to the AZ Department of Motor Vehicles and Service Arizona. I couldn't even think of those words.
"I'm looking for it."
"I'll be right back."
So he walked away and then I started crying because in my head I was wondering why in the eff this was happening. I had 3 kids in the car, we'd been on the road for oh about 7 hours. and we were tired. Plus my van smelled like fast food. Was that not enough?
He walked back up to the van and I showed him the email.
"How long will it take it to get here? Oh I see it says 5 days. You really should have gone into the building itself to get a copy."
"My husband is in the military and we are between houses right now. Plus I have 3 kids."
"I could ticket you for not having your license and you'd have to go in front of a judge with proof. Of course by then you'd have the license,"
"Yeah and I could tell you you're an idiot because I've done everything in my power I can do. I've ordered it. Paid the fuggin $12 and I know my license number!" I didn't say that.
"Well try and keep it out of your kids hands. Because you really need to have it on you. I'm just gonna give you a verbal warning today. But watch your speed. Especially because you have kids."
"Thank you so much."
SO! The new me would be so grateful for the great luck I had in not getting any sort of ticket. I didn't even get a piece of paper! I got off sooooo nicely. And I'm truly thankful for that.
The devilish side of me wants to say what a dum guy he is. This is why law enforcement has a bad name. Because of people like him. He made his point the FIRST time he told me I needed to have a copy of my license on me at all times. He didn't need to tell me how I need to keep my purse out of my kids hands or how I needed to go into the building and blah blah. I did the best that I could as a normal human being. For realz
He was the nicest dickiest cop. There. I'm still sad angry though. Because like I said before, I know what's in my heart and I wasn't trying to be an idiotic non safe driver.
I hope instead of pulling innocents over, he finds the chomos his mustache takes after.
So I pulled off the side of the road and had a brief panic attack in just enough time for the nice man in the tan uniform to come to my window. It was already rolled down and I already had my registration and proof of insurance in my hand.
The lights from his car reflected nicely off of his molestashe and the shadow from his Stetson made it even creepier.
"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"No I don't."
"Do you know what the speed limit is through that construction zone?"
"No I don't" These were all truths to me. Because lesbi honest here. My heart was racing and I was trying to figure out if maybe I flipped him off, or if I was swerving from French fry reaching or what.
"It's 35. You were going 57 when you passed me. Did you see me parked on the side of the road?"
"No I didn't." Again, you probably think I'm lying. But deep down to the core of my heart I. had. no. idea I was going so fast! I was going with the flow of traffic. I promise.
"I'm gonna need your license."
"I actually don't have it. But I know my number and I ordered my license online yesterday."
"What happened to it?"
"I have a 2 year old."
"Do you have the email?" At this point I was already desperately trying to search through my inbox to find it. I couldn't think straight and I"m pretty sure I searched for things non related to the AZ Department of Motor Vehicles and Service Arizona. I couldn't even think of those words.
"I'm looking for it."
"I'll be right back."
So he walked away and then I started crying because in my head I was wondering why in the eff this was happening. I had 3 kids in the car, we'd been on the road for oh about 7 hours. and we were tired. Plus my van smelled like fast food. Was that not enough?
He walked back up to the van and I showed him the email.
"How long will it take it to get here? Oh I see it says 5 days. You really should have gone into the building itself to get a copy."
"My husband is in the military and we are between houses right now. Plus I have 3 kids."
"I could ticket you for not having your license and you'd have to go in front of a judge with proof. Of course by then you'd have the license,"
"Yeah and I could tell you you're an idiot because I've done everything in my power I can do. I've ordered it. Paid the fuggin $12 and I know my license number!" I didn't say that.
"Well try and keep it out of your kids hands. Because you really need to have it on you. I'm just gonna give you a verbal warning today. But watch your speed. Especially because you have kids."
"Thank you so much."
SO! The new me would be so grateful for the great luck I had in not getting any sort of ticket. I didn't even get a piece of paper! I got off sooooo nicely. And I'm truly thankful for that.
The devilish side of me wants to say what a dum guy he is. This is why law enforcement has a bad name. Because of people like him. He made his point the FIRST time he told me I needed to have a copy of my license on me at all times. He didn't need to tell me how I need to keep my purse out of my kids hands or how I needed to go into the building and blah blah. I did the best that I could as a normal human being. For realz
He was the nicest dickiest cop. There. I'm still sad angry though. Because like I said before, I know what's in my heart and I wasn't trying to be an idiotic non safe driver.
I hope instead of pulling innocents over, he finds the chomos his mustache takes after.
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