HER FIVE CENTS

The effects of the magnesium cotrate drink I ingested for a colonoscopy at 33: temporary
The feeling of the paper pants with a bum flap on my skin: temporary
Remembering the experience: permanent

Tears streamed down both sides of my face last night going from the inner corners to the outer corners of my eyes and sliding down into my ears and onto my pillow. I don't know why I was crying. It was only Wednesday and I didn't think I would make it through the week.

We got back from our Instagram worthy trip to New Zealand on Saturday. I was really looking forward to a day of rest and secretly a break from the kids.

Sunday was Fathers Day! David had staff duty! (An army term for when they have to essentially be at work for 24 hours in case of emergency.)

That day sucked. I wasn't prepared for celebrating David except for the record I secretly bought him in NZ that was only sort-of on his list. They didn't have any of his first pick choices. I didn't make him breakfast, we ate on post for lunch, and I halfway made dinner and dessert. I was tired and full of anxiety in anticipating the week ahead when he would be gone to France. This always happens. Usually I have more time to process him being gone and one day, Fathers Day, was not enough.

He left Monday.

While in New Zealand I jokingly called "Not it!" To taking Sadie to her orthopedic appointment when we returned home. We had removed her cast temporarily (which was split for possible swelling) so she could thoroughly enjoy the thermal pools in Hamner Springs. I was not looking forward to explaining that to her doctor. I was terrified of the Guilt with a capital G that comes from doctors. The appointment was Monday.

It was a lot of fun taking her in and trying to explain how we lost her crutches at a bus stop and since then she'd been getting around rather well hopping like a bunny with one leg. To which I promptly received an anecdotal story from the doctor in which she broke her ankle as a kid and hopped on her other which she then sprained. From hopping. 

Otherwise the appointment was fine. The Guilt inflicted was minimal. I didn't even receive questions as to why there was a sock UNDER the cast (it's winter in NZ and her toesies were cold) nor did they ask why It had been removed. They simply placed another one and handed over a new set of crutches with better instructions than YouTube had offered for climbing stairs.

Tuesday was okay. We didn't do much. Thankfully. I still put on a bra and some mascara (because Italians are always dressed) in order to go pick up my drink of death for my appointment the next day. We all hobbled into the farmacia where I clumsily asked for one of four choices in drinks. I pointed to the one with the least amount of litres to drink. She handed it over with no instructions as how to consume it.

Went home. Ate my last supper (rice, oil, and cheese) and went on to well, you know. I tried to sleep and told my kids they had to fend for themselves.

Next day was the day. This was yesterday. My dear friends really came to my aid. My neighbour watched the girls while my other friend drove me to the appointment. We did a lot of waiting. The best part of the appointment was the tall, bearded doctors and the Italians obsessing over Sparkles' talent for knitting. I don't think they know what it is.

The worst part was everything else. Awful. It was awful. The day was made better by homemade potato soup and banana splits and an episode of The Bachelorette. The good didn't last long before the small humans were wailing for me to join them upstairs.

This recap of the week doesn't even include the times where we had really intense freakouts from each child over something or another. Or the broken glass, the spilled Nerds, stepped on cereal, hurt feelings, body mousse in the hair at extreme amounts, smeared lipstick and mascara, croup coughing, etc.

In bed last night I told myself I didn't want to do this anymore. This is not what I signed up for. 

Life is not all beautiful and full of white space like we often see on Instagram and Facebook. Can we try to remember that more often? Or maybe I need the reminder for myself and this is my way of doing it. 

1) Show up to Disneyland Paris or Walt Disney Studios Park

2) Present your military ID

3) Don't bring more than 5 people per ID

4) Purchase tickets (see below) 

5) Have a blast! 

Keep in mind there are discounts offered for 2 and 3 day passes for both parks. There are no 4 day or single park passes offered at a discounted rate. 

2017 is the year to go! Disneyland Paris is celebrating 25 years which means so much magic! Check their website and their app for what's happening. It starts March 26th, 2017 with no end date announced. 

Extra tips and tricks: 

1) Walt Disney Studios Park is worth it! Make time for it! 

2) Bring your own food and drink. Save your money for other stuff. We got by our first day at Disneyland spending 0 $/€. We brought PB&J's, turkey sandwiches, granola bars, Capri Sonnes, and water. There were 4 adults and 4 eating children. 

3) Shop for souvenirs outside of the park in Disney Village. They are open late and offer the same items. Plus, Starbucks. lol. 

4) Use the app! Make sure one person in your party has data service while you're there. It offers up-to-date wait times, schedules of events, and maps! Seriously, I was surprised at how well put-together it was.

5) Catch a show or parade if you're with kids. It's totally worth it! 

What else am I missing? Let me know! 

I wish I could write an entire post with song lyrics. I probably will. But maybe not today.

Today instead, I shall tell about these last few days.

So starting Wednesday my depression was acting up. I was feeling sad and lonely and regrettably angry at my husband for "doing this to me". I wondered why I was here and what I was doing which are all questions I ask myself after every move or big change.

I had also started to question our decision to leave everything behind for our wonderful friends/neighbors to take care of. Previous to coming to Italy the first time (last week), we gave POA to a few friends to sign for our stuff with the movers (and other out-processing tasks). I was especially questioning and feeling guilty because they (the movers) called David that day and said they were coming Thursday and Friday and not just Friday as originally planned.

After David got home, we were chatting about everything and I got a phone call which I let propel me into my unstable emotional state. I lost it. I cried and was angry and we made the rash decision to drive back to Germany at 10 p.m.

That happened.

On the way, as the sun was coming up and we were somewhat close to home, our car broke. I mean, I don't know that that's when it actually broke but I'm pretty sure it was on this trip. The next morning David took it to the best mechanic we've ever had and he told us not to fix it. Lol. He said it would cost 2500 euro and would involve taking out the entire engine, etc. He said they COULD fix it but he didn't recommend it. And he told us not to buy Opel's anymore because it's a common problem. Germany friends, if you need a mechanic, let me know. They are reputable. He always actually shows us what's going on in the car... with our own eyes. He has on several occasions picked us up in his own car and taken us back home when our vehicle needs to stay. Like this day (Thursday). He said they could fix it enough to hopefully get us back to Italy (which it did and since then, has worked pretty well).

So there's blessing in disguise number one. What if the car had broken here in Italy where we know no one and have not yet established working relationships with any car people?

Jackson and I watched big brother episode one while the movers packed up our stuff. I snuggled on the couch and even took a nap in my bed.

Then it was Friday.

Everything happened this day! I messaged my mom that in one day: the movers came, I went to the hospital and we bought a car. All in less than 24 hours!

It all went smoothly. We are now proud owners of a Root Beer Float. That's what our cars name is. It looks like one.

We left the movers alone in our house for hours while we were in the process of getting the car situation figured out. Maybe we had cool movers, maybe we didn't but the people who are spreading false information should probably do some fact-checking.

I have asked several people and no one has had a satisfactory answer as to how they decide what they are and are not going to pack. After directing them to yes, please take David's suits, and yes please take the vacuum and to yes please take our memory foam bed topper…they were off! At 240 p.m.! There were a few things I really appreciated about how they handled the move and a few things I didn't love. I really thought it was great that they saved packing up our bedding and kitchen and bathroom stuff for the second day. We were still comfortable that night because we had all of our stuff. I loved that. What I didn't love (and I'm writing this down so I remember because most of it was the same from our move to Germany)

--The final stuff… always feels crazy rushed. I was rushed with signing the papers. Including the survey stuff which clearly states they are not to be around when it is filled out.

--They left trash! They didn't leave their packing materials but they did leave food trash and stuff in my paper bin. Um, you live in Germany. You know better. They also left a big black bag full of trash in our front driveway

-- And of course the random crap they left behind. I also figured out after they were long gone that they didn't move a single thing from the guest bathroom in the entryway, they didn't take my fake tree that is huge, and then other random things which ended up completely filling the broken car.

So Lisa, when you move next time, don't let them do this stuff! Because most likely you'll be flying to your next duty station and ain't nobody got suitcases for dat.

Anyway, it was pretty smooth sailing after that.

For the last 3 days we were in Germany, we were staying with Ian and Mariah. And this is blessing in disguise number …. Many. If none of this had happened, we wouldn't have had the time to stay with them. I really needed it. I slept SO well on that couch, and my heart and soul are filled to the brim with positive memories. I'm thankful and seriously so blessed (Did you ever read that blog?).

I’ve had this post written for awhile but the internet here at the hotel is not good. At all. It may take 5 hours to post, but I’m gonna try! Will you come visit? 

I'm serious when I say this is the best neighborhood I've ever lived in. That might offend some of you because I may have been your neighbor in a previous era of my time on earth. However, where I live now has established itself in the most coveted spot of Best Neighborhood In My Life.

The view from 200 ft above our neighborhood. Photo cred: Derik D.

David and I have a conversation every so often about how he likes the country but could be happy in the city but he doesn't usually like "cookie cutter houses" and suburban neighborhoods. However, I think living on name removed because OPSEC has changed his views although I won't speak for him. I on the other hand, LOVE the idea of neighborhoods just like ours where everyone knows everyone and there's no drama. Who cares that our houses are pretty much exactly the same? Who cares that The Other Side has a front AND backyard (rude!)?

I mentioned to a couple of friends recently that I really believe in that whole "village" idea. Where we all help each other out and that's kind of what we have here. There's usually someone every day who needs to run to the store, or finish charting, or make dinner, or go to the bathroom alone and we all pitch in to watch the kiddos while she (or he) goes and does that. It's so lovely.

What I'm feeling extra sad about is this chunk of happiness time is dwindling for me. I know that's a terrible way of looking at it (half empty much?) but I can't help but be super depressed about it. It comes up in daily conversation for me and my frens here on name removed Strasse.

I'm really starting to feel it because The Originals (sorry newbies) have slowly started (or have already gone) to PCS. I was actually supposed to be one of the final 4 to leave. That's changing*.

I'm going to miss community potlucks and egg hunts and Halloween parties. I'm going to miss you-cook-tonight-and-I'll-cook-tomorrow nights. I'll especially miss sitting outside on the green chairs (or the brown ones if I can convince someone to bring them over) and listening to Eric or Chris play the Uke (am I trendy enough to shorten that?). I'll miss those warm summer nights spent outside until 1 a.m. when it's finallllllly cool enough to go inside and open the windows again. I'll miss Thirsty Thursday's in my backyard drinking Diet Beverage with whoever is out that evening.  I'll miss baby showers, birthday and welcome/goodbye parties. I'll miss toys and chalk everywhere on the street. I'll miss sending my kids to their best friends houses which happen to be a few yards away in any direction. I'll miss my own best friends being a few yards away.  I may even miss those annoying as hell 2 a.m. doughnut-doers in the Edeka parking lot. Nah, I won't miss them.

I meant for this to be a funnier post but it kind of got serious and sentimental. I tell you, it's the nature of this Army life. Because it got all emotional, I'm feeling like I need to put together a Senior Slideshow like we had when we graduated. I think I might do it. lol. I'll add some good music and it will make everyone, or maybe just me, cry. Maybe the Sophomores and Juniors should do it for us? Yeah. I'll make the President tell them to do it. We totally have one of those even though she kind of refuses to do her job. Who cares that she was elected unofficially? lol.

I love every single one of you! Even the ones who have already gone. I'm talking to you Christina, Yvonne, Tasha, Krysta and Stacey and your spouses/kids.

*Stay tuned. I'm not going public till it's official. Edit: It's become official. But if you don't know where we are going you aren't a true friend or you don't read my blog enough. jk.

I wish I could read minds right now. I want to know exactly what you think when I mention the word refugee. I want to know what you think when you hear (or have already heard) that there were 1.1 million refugees who entered Germany last year. Where does your mind go when you know/hear/read there might be members of ISIS hidden among them?

What do you have to say when I tell you that the very majority of them are just regular people...people like you and people like me?



I don't generally write with a purpose in mind. I suppose I do subconsciously, but today I would really like to inform you of a few things that you may not know.

1. On average, a refugee in Germany receives €500 euro's a month in benefits.
2. The cost of living is higher in Germany than it is in middle-eastern countries.
3. Many refugees want to leave because of the harsh realities that face them  here: living conditions, lack of job opportunity, and treatment from immigration offices, among other things.

I believe it!

We had an awesome opportunity to visit a couple of shelters a few weekends ago with a group of amazing people. 2 women I had never met in person organized a Caravan of Compassion for the community here at and around USAG Bavaria. It was a huge success. PLEASE visit Betsy's post about our experience. There are some great pictures and information there.

The people we went with (and took items in behalf of) were SO generous!  I wish I could have recorded the whole thing but what I felt was way different then what I physically experienced.

At the first shelter, a men's shelter, we dropped off warm blankets, shoes and other hygeine supplies to aid in the what once was lack of heat in the shelter, their long walk to a place with accessibility to a kitchen (2 km) and cold weather. I was completely overwhelmed when I stepped inside. This building used to be a school and in the gym were cots lining the walls, and the center of the floor. Their belongings were all within a few square feet of them. Their jackets (if they had them) hung on the walls. Otherwise, there wasn't much else there except men with a longing in their heart I'm sure, for something better than this.

We each passed out blankets and shampoo and shoes to the men who were there. They loved the kids and smiled big every time we approached. They especially loved Nevie's blonde hair.

Next we went to the family shelter housed in an old school as well. We were one of the first families to arrive and because we were, we had a few moments to spend with some of the families. There was a particular family I attached myself to. It was a family of 6. One of their teenage sons was particularly friendly. He even spoke pretty good English! He was more than helpful with getting stuff out of the cars and helping other people find what they needed. The littlest of the family (2 years old) was super cute. He kept giving Nevie kisses on her arm.

 We had planned on spending most of our time there but because of the lack of communication among guards, we were unable to go inside. So we made do! We set up our mini-shopping mall in the courtyard of this building. There was so much stuff. More than enough to fill a Goodwill. People brought suitcases, and toys, new clothes and coats, shoes,  hygeine supplies (good brands) and baked goods.

It was amazing watching how humble these people were. I've heard stories of refugees that would say otherwise but what I witnessed was nothing short of amazing. Towards the end we were pushing empty bags onto the families telling them to take more. A lot of them were surprised. I also realize that what they own has to be confined to a small space. Have you ever considered what that would be like? Packing your entire life up in a suitcase?

We had an opportunity to visit with these people and that's what I wish I had more of: time. Time to hear more stories. Time to get to know these people. Just one of the boys there witnessed his family burned inside of his home at age 12. He was able escape with burns covering the middle section of his body. He has scars to prove it. He waited until he was old enough to come to Germany where he currently resides, less than a mile from me.

It's stories like these, and many others that make me want to do more. However, I can't do it alone. I'm reaching out and asking you for help. I'm asking you to consider what you have and if there's anything you can part with. I've listed a few of the things they are in need of currently:

Shoes
Shampoo
Hygiene Items (shampoo, conditioner, pads, razors, etc)
Diapers/Wipes (at the shelter we went to, they are rationed. They receive 4 diapers a day)
Old cell phones
Toys/Games
Suitcases/Bags
Other comfort items one might want/need

Consider donating cash if you live far and we will shop in behalf of you. The thing is, this is a great opportunity for you to get really involved in the refugee situation because I live right here. Right among the news story you see on TV. I'd be glad to be your proxy and serve those who so desperately need it. I'm telling you, nothing changes you like seeing adults and children walking around outside in flip flops and short sleeve shirts.

I appreciate each and every one of you. I am thankful for the opportunity to be a part of the community I live in. For our outing on Saturday, I had 4 friends (1 person I had never met) donate items to me. My trunk was packed full of stuff and I came home with just as much excess. SO! I'd really like to another Caravan. My friends and I have already discussed doing another similar type event. Just as one of our coordinators said, the 2 shelters we visited were 2 of 1000 in that area alone (Nuremberg). So if you want to get involved please send donations to:
Lisa Nickle
CMR 415 BOX 6880
APO, AE 09114

(It's a US Post Office so there isn't any additional charges for sending overseas. In fact, there's a discount)

OR you can PayPal me a cash donation. Please make sure to include a short message noting it's for the Caravan of Compassion.

Also, Betsy wrote another post before the caravan which is still relevant and very informative. You can find that here. 

Thank you again for reading this far! Sending you so much love!

P.S. That boy in the picture with Jackson was so super wonderful. He was so busy helping other people he forgot to get shoes for himself. The ones he is wearing in the picture are way too big for him. We searched high and low for some that fit and found a pair that semi-worked. I'd love to buy him a new pair of shoes. Will you help? :-)

Source:
Wall Street Journal

Someone once told me that if I want to feel at home for Christmas, go to Germany. Or some quote like that. lol. Basically it meant that Germany is homey feeling at the holidays. It is true!

I wish I would I have written this the night it all happened because as we were driving home, I was overwhelmed by how awesome the whole day was! It was honestly kind of magical. It may have been the sugar high, who knows?

Before I get to the other stuff, one important order of business. It's my birthday week! Thursday is my actual day. And I have already felt super important. Thank you Chels and David!

First we went to Ikea, which is always fun because...meatballs. and 2 hours! of uninterrupted shopping time. Just kidding. Sadie didn't go in the play place and Nevie wanted out about 25 minutes in. And of course my beeper thing went off when I was quite possibly the furthest from the play center.

Secondly, the sunset in the parking lot. Unbelievable. Indescribable Soaring, Tumbling... oh wait.


Thirdly, Nuremberg Christmas market!

Chelsi had a taste of the traditional gluhwein

We had expensive hot chocolate (we kept the mugs!)

Nevie had Sbux hot chocolate (less spillage and way less hot!)

Fourthly, Almost Chipotle! Seriously. The best thing since Frankfurt's actual Chipotle. Everyone go to Mr. Burrito in Nuremberg! Thanks Pembey's for the recommendation!

I may have had to erase an inappropriate something in that heart .

And lastly, Dunkin Donuts! No pictures there. But really, what could have made this night better? I'm not sure there was anything we missed except maybe the kids section. haha. And maybe a little less people (it was insane!). Otherwise, we loved it! Where do you visit that gets you in the mood for Christmas? Target? Christmas Tree stands? Your living room?